[qrpcat] OT - Ets un malalt de la ràdio?

ea3ert a qrp.cat ea3ert a qrp.cat
dic maig 11 10:48:32 CEST 2016

Hola llista,

Pedroneu la sortida de tema però no m'he pogut resistir :-)

Encara que algunes de les qüestions són molt americanes, si et sents 
identificat amb cinc o més no ho dubtis: ETS UN MALALT DE LA RÀDIO.

1. When you look at a full moon and wonder how much antenna gain you 
would need.

2. When a friend gets a ride from you and remarks that you have a lot of 
CBs in your vehicle, it turns in to an hour long rant on how ham radio 
is not CB radio.

3. When someone asks for directions, you pause, wondering if long or 
short path would be best.

4. When you can look at a globe and be able to point to your antipode 
(and you know what an antipode is).

5. Your cell phone ring tone is a Morse code message of some kind.

6. You have accidentally said your Amateur Radio call sign at the end of 
a telephone conversation.

7. Your favorite vacation spots are always on mountain tops.

8. You notice more antennas than road signs while driving your car.

9. You have driven onto the shoulder of the road while looking at an 

10. Porcupines appear to be fascinated with your car.

11. If you ever tried to figure out the operating frequency of your 
microwave oven.

12. When you look around your bedroom of wall to wall ham gear and ask: 
Why am I still single?

13. The local city council doesn't like you.

14. You actually think towers look pretty.

15. Your family doesn't have a clue what to get you for Christmas, even 
after you tell them.

16. Your HF amplifier puts out more power than the local AM radio 

17. The wife and kids are away and the first thing that goes through 
your head is that no one will bother you while you call "CQ - DX" a few 
hundred times.

18. When you pull into a donut shop and the cops there on their coffee 
break ask if they can see your radio setup.

19. You refer to your children as your "Harmonics".

20. Your girlfriend or wife asks: "You're going to spend $XXXX on 

21. You plan family vacations around hamfest dates.

22. When you see a house with a metal roof, and your only thought is 
what a great ground plane that would be.

23. You have pictures of your radio equipment as wallpaper on your 
computer's desktop.

24. Every family vacation includes a stop at a Ham radio store.

25. The first question you ask the new car dealer is: "What is the 
alternator's current output"?

26. You buy a brand new car based on the radio mounting locations and 
antenna mounting possibilities.

27. You have tapped out Morse code on your car's horn.

28. A lightning storm takes out a new Laptop, Plasma TV, and DVD 
Recorder, but all you care about is if your radios are okay.

29. Your wife has had to ride in the back seat because you had radio 
equipment in the front seat.

30. Your wife threatens you with divorce when you tell her that you are 
going on a "fox" hunt.

31. Your wife says 'the kids need to be fed' and you first wonder what 
their impedances are.

32. When house hunting, you look for the best room for a radio shack and 
scan the property for possible tower placement.

33. When house hunting, you give your realtor topographical maps showing 
local elevations.

34. The real estate agent scratches his head when you ask if the soil 
conductivity is high, medium, or low.

35. You have Ham radio magazines in the bathroom.

36. When your doorbell rings, you immediately shut down the amplifier.

37. Fermentation never enters your mind when "homebrew" is mentioned.

38. Instead of just saying no, you have said "negative".

39. You have used a person's name to indicate acknowledgment.

40. You become impatient waiting for the latest AES catalog to arrive.

41. You have found yourself whistling "CQ" using Morse code.

42. You always schedule the last full weekend in June for vacation.

43. You walk carefully in your back yard to avoid being close-lined.

44. You have deep anxiety or panic attacks during high winds or heavy 

45. You and the FedEx/UPS men are on a first name basis.

46. You really start to miss people that you've never seen.

47. Your exercise machine is a Morse code keyer.

48. You walk through the plumbing section at the hardware store and see 
antenna parts.

49. Your neighbors thought you were nuts when you ripped up your lawn to 
bury chicken wire.

50. Your next door neighbor thinks that your wife is a widow.

51. Your wife has delivered meals to your Ham shack.

52. If you sold all your Ham radio equipment, you could pay off your 

53. Removing snow from the roof of your car requires working around the 
antenna and wires.

54. You have never seen a Meteor Shower because you are inside on 6 
meters when they occur.

55. If your radio equipment has a more advanced processor than your PC.

56. You hear about a pileup on the local news and you run to your radio 
equipment and start calling CQ.

57. If you install ferrite beads and place shrink tubing on your toaster 
appliance cords.

58. If your wife puts something on and asks "Does this make me look too 
fat?" and you reply with: "Honey you have an excellent front to back 
ratio with appreciable forward gain on the front lobes."

59. If you think the half human / half machine individuals on a Borg 
Cube are really just a friendly group of electronic experimenters with 
similar interests.

60. You have no idea as to the weather forecast for tomorrow, but know 
the solar forecast for the next month.

61. If your blood type is RF positive.

62. You sell your dog to buy an amplifier.

63. Your XYL says communication is important in a marriage...so you buy 
another radio for the shack.

64. You doodle Hartley and Colpitts oscillators during boring meetings.

65. ..your boss ask's if you understand? And you reply "QSL" !!!

66. You have been going to the library since you were three and the only 
shelf you ever go to has Dewey Decimal number 621.

67. You have invested more on your radio equipment than on your kids 

68. You hire a babysitter to come over, and then you never leave the 
house-you just go to the shack so you can contest undisturbed.

69. You occasionally buy a Playboy magazine and let your Mom find it , 
just so she can think that you are 'normal'.

70. You'll spend hundreds of dollars on a new rig, and then wander the 
hamfest pausing each time you pass the booth selling those $7 
embroidered callsign hats thinking "I wonder if they'll take $6?"

71. When shopping for a new vehicle the first think you look for is 
space to mount the radios - you end up sitting in the front seat staring 
blankly at the dashboard area, feeling underneath seats, and poking 
around the backseat for ways to route the coax. If caught looking under 
the hood for holes in the firewall for your power cables, you tell your 
wife, "Nothing honey, just checking things under here."

72. Your family has a special annual garage sale just to get rid of the 
boxes of wire, coax, and power adapters-but you pay your friends to 
"buy" the stuff and get them to quietly return it to you the following 

73. The $10 bargain you got at the fleamarket that smoked up the whole 
house when you turned it on is one of your prized possessions.

74. Your wife has called you three times for dinner - then she calls you 
on the repeater.

75. When going on vacation, the first thing you think about packing is 
your handhelds, chargers, scanner and frequency book.

76. The total number of radio related books in your home are five times 
the total number of all other books and magazines.

77. You visually check your outdoor antennas and coax once a week, 
regardless of the weather.

78. You have more certificates and licenses on the wall than your local 
veterinarian or dentist.

79. All the local cops know your vehicle on sight - "it's the blue Ford 
with six antennas".

80. You think an upside to gaining weight is more belt space for radios.

73's de Toni,EA3ERT

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